Ahh yisss, remakes... the boogeyman of film lovers. This boogeyman visited my twitter feed last weekend as it came to my attention that the beloved horror classic Suspiria (1977) has fallen victim to it and will be in theaters rather soon. 

Yes, yes. You loved the Suspiria (2018) trailer, I know, I know. Most people did. I am not hating on the Suspiria remake because I disliked the trailer. I actually thought it didn't look too bad, but more on that later. I am hating the new Suspiria movie for very different reasons.

I don't think anyone would argue with me if I would say that the original Suspiria movie is a visual experience, because it is. The set design, the way it was shot, the colors; the entire visual experience per scene is different and really sets the mood of every scene. Many people would, however, argue that it lacks a plot, but I guess it makes up for it being beautifully stylized. The original is art, no doubt about that. So why a remake?


As far as I can tell Luca Guadagnino, the director of the 2018 Suspiria, wanted to re-imagine the story of the horror classic. That's cool, I guess. But for me it comes with so many questions. Almost everyone knows (and Guadagnino knows this too) that the original can't be topped. "If you can't top the original, do something different" is something that someone commented on reddit. That's all fine and well, but that makes no sense. If you can't top the original, why remake it? It is obvious that this is just another pointless remake. Based on the trailer it doesn't look, or feel, like the original at all. And if it is a so-called "homage", or whatever, why call it Suspiria?

As I said before, the original is a visual experience. Whenever someone mentions the original movie I think about bright colors and beautifully stylized sets. When I compare the thoughts and feelings that I get when thinking about Suspiria (1977) with what I saw during the Suspiria (2018) trailer is vastly different, and I would want to argue that it is therefore unfair to call it a remake, or for the movie to even adopt the name of the original.

What I don't like about most remakes is that they do not capture what the original wanted to do, in this case giving a visual experience, and I am scared it will overshadow the original. Not a lot of people outside of the horror and/or movie enthusiasts club have heard of the original Suspiria, which, I guess, makes it kind of a cult classic. Now that they are remaking it with Hollywood/famous actors, hyping it up like crazy, it has already overshadowed the original in many ways. A lot of casual moviegoers will probably see this in the movie theater being completely unaware of the original. and when they do find out there is an original out there, they wont like it, as it is so vastly different from the remake. And that makes me sad, that these people will never be able to appreciate the original for what it is.

One of the movies that also pissed me off last year, riding on the coattails of an old-school name, is Jumanji. Nothing about the new Jumanji screamed Jumanji. It was a totally stand-alone film that didn't feel like it had anything to do with the original. But let's just piggyback off of the older generations and their nostalgia. We have so many remakes and unoriginal stories. Why can't we make something original, is it that difficult? Why can't we just be inspired and create our own classics?

Jumanji was, I believe, a movie many kids loved from their childhoods. Why can't they just make their own Jumanji, why steal a name and then trying to make it your own?

But enough about Jumanji, this is about Suspiria.

In closing

Based on the trailer Suspiria (2018) doesn't look like a bad movie. I just think it would've been better if it had come up with its own name, instead of relying so heavily on it being a "remake" (these were also the words of a redditor). The trailer looked decent, but had nothing to do with the original Suspiria. It looks like a lot of other horror movies who use muted palettes. Suspiria (1977) was a stunning original movie because it was so different from all other movies; it wasn't scared to throw bright colors in your face, even tho the story itself was very dark. This 2018 adaption should've just used its own name and take pride in the fact that it was heavily inspired by Suspiria (1977). Excited to be disappointed once this hits theaters.

Short version: The movie is boring for more "experienced" movie goers, but might be somewhat entertaining to easily entertained or startled people. Don't expect anything special tho.

Escape Room (2017) starts out as a pretty interesting movie; two Arabic looking guys are in a desert burying a mysterious box... and then they die. Followed by a long ass intro. Movies really need to stop doing this. The movie then shifts from the desert to an urban looking environment. We get introduced to the first two characters in the movie and from that point on you can tell how high the level of acting in this movie is going to be. 

Around the 11 minute mark there is a cheap jump scare attempt that adds nothing to the movie at all and wont scare anyone because it isn't scary. Around this time I also realized how low the color saturation for this movie was. The main character then goes into this creepy looking store looking for authentic stuff. The lady who owns the store is trying to be all mysterious and vague about the authentic stuff in her store but honestly comes off as freaking weird and I just want to slap her silly. The guy then explains that he owns an escape room and wants to have special stuff to be different~ from the competition. His eye falls on an item behind the lady. It is the mysterious box we saw the two Arabic dudes burying in the desert. A scene follows where the guy is literally eye fucking the box, and obviously wants it really, really badly. The lady starts talking about the "history" of the box and tells us its very, very original name: *･ﾟ☆THE SKULL BOX☆ﾟ･*. And at this point in the movie I got annoyed and confused:

So, this lady starts talking how evil this box is and that you can’t open it and she wants to keep it save, right? Then why does she literally have the box standing on a table behind her?!?!? Anyone has access to it!!! She could maybe bump into it one day and the box opens and then what? Shouldn’t she keep it somewhere save? Even if she thinks it's unnecessary to keep it safe, why is she telling him all about this box? Why doesn’t she just say “hey hi yea this is a family heirloom wont sell this sorry”. Instead she spills all its secrets!! All I could think was “bitch why you tell him about the box?”.

The shop owner lady then conveniently gets a phone call so she walks away from the box, she picks up the phone and she starts quoting the Gremlins movie?? I still don’t know what that was about. It wasn’t witty or cute, it was goddamn confusing. When she walks back to the counter the dude obviously stole the box. I mean… really? We then get introduced to the other characters in this movie (a group of 4 friends) and I was hoping that they would be a bit more decent when it comes to acting but I was genuinely disappointed. And then the movie honestly falls apart. Barely halfway in and I couldn’t be more bored; You know the acting is never going to get better, the only interesting thing was the box which we already know everything about now, and we know these 4 friends are going to be locked into an escape room with the box. It can’t get more predictable than that.

Once they have entered the escape room nothing happens. They try to solve puzzles but this one girl keeps complaining how bored she is. And then when the first guy dies the movie is literally about 3 people, a dead guy, and an evil guy being stuck in a room. That’s it. They aren’t doing anything. They are just there and it isn’t scary. Yeah, the bad guy looks kinda creepy, and he is supposed to be a demon or something, but he doesn’t give off any demon vibes. The only thing I’m scared off are the scissors he is holding most of the movie.

Escape Room felt like a waste of time. There were no good moments except for the desert intro which honestly kind of reminded me of Jumanji (1995). The concept of Escape Room was interesting, but the story sucked and it was also poorly executed. This movie should’ve taken notes from movies like Exam (2009) and Buried (2010) where the characters are also stuck in the same “room” the entire time. In the movie Exam the room has different elements and the characters have depth. In the movie Buried you are constantly on the edge of your seat because of all the different variables that can prevent the main character from ever getting out alive. In Escape Room you have nothing, just people in a room freaking out.

2 out of 10 stars**

The first article I saw popping up today on my news feed app was a story about a dog dying on a United Airline's flight. The dog was a French bulldog named Kokito. Kokito was under the supervision of his eleven year old owner (who got the dog for her birthday), the girl's baby sibling, and the girl's mother. They were flying from Houston to New York on Monday after visiting the girl's dad. Apparently, before the flight took off, a flight attendant told the girl and her mother that the bag was blocking the path and they had to put the bag up in the overhead locker. The girl said "it's a dog, it's a dog" and apparently some other passengers said too that there was a dog in the bag but the flight attendant wouldn't listen and insisted that the bag (with the dog) had to be placed in the overhead locker. In the end they complied, the dog barked for two hours or something, went quiet, and after the three hour flight they found him dead (no surprise there).

Of course everyone is blaming United Airline's for the death of the dog, or at least, every article that I read on the internet covering this "tragic accident" (as United Airline's called it) is blaming United Airline's, but I don't think United Airline's is the only one to blame. I just think the dog owners weren't being responsible at all on top of the fact that the entire story makes no sense to me.

The first thing that makes no sense to me is that if the flight attendant really had known there was a living and breathing being in the bag would she really have demanded it being in the locker? How could this flight attendant have been so careless and not have known there was a dog in the bag? According to many reportings the dog was being carried in a TSA approved bag so how didn't this flight attendant notice? And once the dog was put there and kept barking, how didn't she hear that? How did no other flight attendants hear it? Why didn't they do anything? If the story that is being reported is true then surely none of these flight attendants are cut out for their job and if United Airline's doesn't fire them they should just quit on their own.

The second thing that makes no sense to me is how the family agreed to put the dog in the overhead locker. Would they have put their baby in the overhead locker? I don't think so. No one was twisting their arm and they could've just left the plane. The dog was also a french bulldog, which is a small breed, and it was only 10 months old. There was no way that the bag they were carrying him in was too big so it could've easily fit under their chair. So why didn't they put up a fight? If you use logic you know that such a young and small dog isn't going to do well in the overhead locker, not even to mention that no living being would do well in an overhead locker. If they cared so much about the dog they should've applied that logic and just have left the plane if the flight attendant kept on insisting to put the bag with the dog up there. If anything, why didn't they take the dog out before putting the bag up there? I know that is probably against the plane policy but at least the flight attendant would've seen the dog and maybe have understood what was going on because she was obviously inattentive. It just seems that everyone in this situation was being ignorant on purpose.

The third thing that makes no sense to me is that a french bulldog is a short-nosed dog, this means it has breathing issues. It is therefore kind of irresponsible to fly with such a dog, also seeing that many dogs that die on airplanes are short-nosed dogs. If you do choose to fly with such a dog you should make sure to reduce its stress levels because of their breathing problems. So even if it was a policy to put the dog in the overhead locker, they shouldn't have because it would obviously make it more stressed. Either the dog was going to stay with them, or they would leave the plane. That should've been their only two options. But again, this is pure ignorance and negligence from the family and mainly the mother.

The fourth thing that makes no sense to me is that they left the dog there for three freaking hours. THREE HOURS. They never checked up on the dog? Who does that? Not even mentioning all these passengers who were also on the plane crying about it on social media. Where were you in all of this?  You said the dog was barking and howling why didn't you check up on the dog? Now you all of a sudden care cause it is dead? But where were you when it was barking and stuck in the overhead locker for three hours? Cry me a river. 

But again, leaving a puppy for three hours alone in the overhead locker is pure ignorance and negligence of the family. I saw an interview with the mother and the kid and the kid was telling the story and she was legit upset. I don't blame her for anything that happened. She's a kid. The mom just looked dumbfounded that such a thing could've happen and didn't seem to want to take any responsibility. She seemed ignorant and obviously uneducated about travelling with dogs and especially with that specific dog breed. It makes me sick that people think they can just carry a dog around like it is a freaking toy or a fashion statement and forget it is ALIVE and BREATHING. A dog isn't there for your convenience; you adopt it into your family and they become a member. You are responsible for its well-being. So take some fucking responsibility. If the mother would've done some research she would've also found out that United Airlines is basically the least pet-friendly airline that exists, seeing that they have the highest rate of pet deaths of any US airline for the past three years.

Yes, of course United Airlines is to blame for the death of Kokito, namely the idiot flight attendant who was being inattentive beyond anything I've ever witnessed. But the family shouldn't get a free pass for this one. Many people would've rather left that flight than putting their dog in the overhead locker because they would know that their pet would die if they would've put it there. These people are called responsible dog owners. As one commenter on this news article put it: "If they are so callous then they should not be having pets( these are live beings no laptops and jackets)."

According to many, many, many news websites Unilever is threatening to pull their advertisements from websites which do not properly handle toxic content and fake news. Some of these news websites are reporting that "Unilever threatens to pull advertisements from Facebook and Google" but that's not completely true, since their marketing director Mr. Weed (yes that is his real name: Keith Weed), didn't specify which platforms Unilever is pulling their advertisements from, but it is pretty clear that this is an open letter to Facebook and Google.

Now, many might think that this is a smart move from Unilever. I mean, they were the second biggest global advertiser in 2017. That is pretty hefty. They probably really care about their brand. Mr. Weed wrote in his speech:

"Unilever, as a trusted advertiser, do not want to advertise on platforms which do not make a positive contribution to society,"

and

“Consumers don’t care about third party verification. They do care about fraudulent practice, fake news, and Russians influencing the U.S. election,” Weed plans to say. “They don’t care about good value for advertisers. But they do care when they see their brands being placed next to ads funding terror, or exploiting children.”

That's really fucking cute coming from the mouth of Unilever! "A positive contribution to society". Dear Unilever, where is your positive contribution to society? You unnecessarily test your products on animals, you pollute waters, and you are a big contributor to destroying the rain forest and yet you dare to talk about these two tech giants, without naming them cause you are a little bitch, telling them that they don't positively contribute to society? You are literally DESTROYING THE EARTH. But I guess you can't see your own hypocritical behavior when you can only see dollar signs.

Unilever all of a sudden cares that their brand name is anywhere close to terror or exploiting children while they pull off practices that are as evil as the ones they are afraid to be connected to.

Seems to me that Unilever is just scared that their brand is associated with something bad and people will look into the brand and during their research they will find out that Unilever is as evil as can be. I don't know if Mr. Weed the marketing director is aware of these Unilever practices but his speech just comes off as hypocritical and otherwise quite ignorant.

Next to the fact that Unilever, an evil brand, tries to tell tech giants and their creators/users what is acceptable and what isn't is laughable at best too. Unilever advertises on television. They advertise on FOX News; the biggest bullshit news source that exists, but you don't hear them making demands over their backs.

I think Facebook and Youtube need to scoff at big brands wanting to pull their ads. Fuck em. The future of advertising doesn't lay in the television landscape but on the world wide web. Both Facebook and Google are the biggest brands on the internet. Unilever can't just make demands like this. Facebook and Google need to call out Unilever for their hypocrisy and tell them that if they don't like it that they can go somewhere else with their advertisements. I mean, where else can they advertise if not on Facebook or Google; Bing? Yahoo? Myspace? If you don't advertise on Facebook or Google you are missing out. Both tech giants should kick big companies to the curb and tell them to take a seat and know their place. They need to stop bending over backwards for the $$$. As long as both platforms are doing well, these big brands will scour back. Facebook and Google need to stop acting like complete doormats for these big advertising brands, especially Google. Youtube is constantly being under attack because advertisers don't get what they want. Guess what: life isn't about you and this is the internet. It is free for all. Either you adapt or you leave. Take a pick.

I find it fine that advertisers want to call out platforms where they advertise when things are going haywire. But they all act like platforms have to meet their demands, like a bunch of bullies. And they keep bullying because no one is stopping or speaking up to them. Fight back a little and tell them to know their place. No one and nothing is perfect, everything will have imperfections and will need improving. Advertising companies need to understand this and stop thinking that they can change the world by pulling their advertisements. Maybe they need to take a step back and look at their own companies and fix shit there before trying to tell other companies what to do and fit their little agenda of perfection.

New year, new Youtube drama. Are you ever tired of it? I know I am, but I am never tired of talking about it and this time we are going to discuss some Logan Paul drama. I will not only talk about Logan Paul but also about everyone who is profiting from this entire fiasco right now and it's pissing me off :) 

To give you a background of the situation: Logan Paul, a 22 year-old Youtuber, uploaded a vlog (a blog in video format) on Youtube about him going to the suicide forest in Japan. He wanted to report hauntings and other spooky stuff or something. Once there, him and his crew found a dead body hanging from a tree. You can watch the video here:

Once the video was posted people went crazy over it; calling it disrespectful towards the victim (which it was) because the victim was shown hanging in the video.

Now, I am not writing this article to only attack Logan Paul, because people on the internet are doing that enough already. Does he deserve much of the backlash? I would say so. I don't understand why he showed the victim hanging. Doesn't matter if he taped the suicide victim or not (albeit it being disrespectful), he could've edited that part out. Apparently the hanging victim was also shown in the thumbnail, which is very disturbing. All he did was sensationalizing suicide which is as fucked up as it can be.

When I was doing my research I found an article by The Verge where they quote Madelyn Gould, a professor of Epidemiology in Psychiatry at Columbia University:

And they quoted a part of a report from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention:

This is kind of scary knowing that his audience is very young. Just going to his apology video (see below) you can see that a lot of people in the comments seem really, really young and most of them are defending his actions too. Parents really need to watch more what their kids are doing and watching on the internet.

But yeah, if you want my opinion about the whole thing: I think Logan Paul lives in a hyped up world where, in his mind, everything is entertainment value or has to be turned into entertainment in one way or another. As he said in his video "Guys I've said this in one of my first vlogs: I've chosen to entertain you guys every single day". The suicide forest video wasn't entertainment. Suicide is not entertainment. It is one thing if they put it in a movie where it is fiction, but it is a whole other thing to be showing and discussing it with so much detail in a vlog... which is basically a video diary for the world to see set in REALITY. The fact that he didn't get that is quite scary.

A thing that honestly got me really mad and irritated throughout the whole video was that stupid brunet guy without the hat who constantly wanted to be on camera and the girl. They were smirking the entire video. There is a thing called nervous laughter, which Logan displayed himself at some point. But what those two were doing were just straight up smirks. At one point the girl is on her phone looking down and just happily smiling as if she didn't just see a dead body. What is wrong with these people? Logan, dude, find some new friends man. These people have no soul.

Furthermore, I've read a lot of articles about the whole thing and also read a lot of tweets and a lot of people made it seem like Logan was straight up cracking jokes the entire time which didn't happen in the video. Many people made it seem worse than it was. I mean, it was already horrible, but you don't have to make it more horrible than it is. It was obvious that Logan was very uncomfortable and he didn't seem to know how to react when they found the body. I just wish he took his time after filming his vlog to rethink the whole thing and cut out the footage of showing the dead body. But again, I don't think it would've mattered because he doesn't understand facts from fiction.

I would also like to state that I have no idea where Youtube was this entire time. It is clearly against their community guidelines to upload such content. The video is down now, but only because Logan deleted it himself. In the meantime, many content creators get account strikes, demonitized, or their videos are deleted for small misdemeanors or for no reason at all. Youtube needs to stop favoring certain content creators over others, especially when it comes to heavy subjects like this.

Oh, and before I get into other stuff I wanted to get into Logan's "apology" on Twitter. I wanted to "dissect" the entire thing but someone on Twitter beat me to it:

Aaand then we get to all the content creators on Youtube immediately jumping ship with their opinions. Look, I really don't mind that they want to come into the entire narrative, say what is on their mind, and tell people (especially young kids) that, what Logan did, is kind of effed up. But what is pissing me off is that most of these content creators have to make 10+ minute videos about it. I tried to watch 3 of them and all of them started out good but then after 2-3 minutes they are just repeating themselves or throwing old stories into the mix. And let's not talk about the ads on the videos!

I feel like a lot of content creators just see this story as another cash cow and that is troubling. Because, as that psychologist lady said, repeating this story and throwing "suicide" in everyone's faces over and over again just makes it dangerous for struggling individuals. Furthermore, they are only giving Logan Paul more name fame...  and I feel like they are making money from this entire thing. They are attacking Logan for "making money off a suicide victim" but aren't these content creators more or less doing the same? Making a "commentary video" isn't that difficult. You just say what is on your mind, record it, edit it for 1 hour max and you put it on Youtube. And no, don't tell me "oh my god glittery what are you saying that commentary YouTubers don't put effort in their videos?". Yeah, well, that is more or less what I am saying. Honestly, I think that they do care about their audience to some extent but come on... their content is really low tier and there are only a handful of channels that seem to put effort into their commentary content.


And let's not even talk about all the people who feel personally offended about this whole ordeal. Chill. No one attacked you personally. Same with the fans: stop. Logan is a public figure, backlash will/can happen over his content. Get over it. And the people crying or looking sad in their thumbnails while trying to profit off of this story are acting as effed up as Logan and his gang did in the vlog.

I really don't know where to end this post because there are just so many emotions going through me about this entire ordeal and all people involved. I am just sick and tired of people blowing things out of proportion and people talking about a subject they know nothing about (like suicide and depression). I guess I will just leave this post with some commentary from the now-deleted subreddit /r/incels:

they might be psychos but they have a point